Even though that friend moved away shortly after that. Even though that house doesn't belong to him anymore, and I know it was not the house nor the people that are now in it that harmed me. I can not look at that house. I can't even pass it with out having a panic attack.
One day I felt brave, or maybe childish. I honestly felt foolish that this house, this two story blue house could haunt me so bad. I felt ashamed when walking by this house with some friends I cover my eyes. Or when marching by it in band I had to look down or straight ahead. I felt stupid and foolish.
"It's just a house Halee, Look at it." That inner voice screamed at me. "Oh such a big scary house, it's gonna attack you, just look at it. You'll never get over it if you don't face it. Look at it."
And one day, I did.
I did look at it. The strangest thing happened... I saw everything from the outside in. It was like x-ray vision into the past. My eyes went straight to the door, and as if to follow my "ghost" if you will through the door and up to each window until...until I came to...that window...That was when I looked away. There was no letting go. Not around that house...
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